Being pregnant is an experience many woman can relate to. Even though every story is different, how cool is it that we are able to create something as special as a human being.
This is our story (not short so beware haha)
I won't forget the moment when I knew I was pregnant. I hadn't told Ryan yet because I was so thrown off to be honest. There was a lot I thought my future would consist of and being pregnant wasn't one of them. I was applying to P.A. (physician assistant) school. My applications were close to being done, just finalizing things, and then I noticed something different with myself.
I was upset but mostly worried about what would happen if I was pregnant. Do I stop applying for school? How would I tell Ryan? Will he be mad? How am I going to go to school and be pregnant at the same time?
So many questions with answers I knew I wouldn't get at the time.
I finally talked to Ryan about it and he went and bought like 3 different tests haha. It was funny and adorable at the same time.
I took the test and the magical double line appeared that everyone impatiently waits for. I went and showed him and his eyes got really big and he said, "take another one to be sure haha." He had the biggest smile on his face, to be a father is something he has always looked forward too. I cry about it now, but I am so ashamed at how mad I was.
I was so angry because it wasn't in my plan. I just got really quiet when the second test again had that magical double line. He couldn't stop smiling and hugged me so close. I sat there in silence for a bit not knowing why this was happening. He even said, "Jordan we can put the baby up for adoption if it will be too hard for you." He said it so serious and heart felt that I think I laughed because it sounded so silly, but still felt overwhelmed.
It took me some time to get over it or accept the fact that I was pregnant. I was just so overwhelmed with work, school, specific responsibilities I had, and I just didn't know how to handle it all with adding a child to the picture.
Well, being sick, was an understatement for me. Threw up every day at least twice for about 7-8 months. My ribs were out of place and I spit up saliva for 9 months. Stupid acid reflux, seriously hate the stuff. I don't wish any of this upon anyone!! But there are a lot of woman who had it worse than me which was hard to believe haha. I lost about 20 pounds which was nice because I was overweight, but I didn't like the way I was losing it obviously.
We got to tell family and it was so much fun! :) Everyone was so excited. One example of many, we told my aunt Stacy and she started crying! It was so sweet Ryan and I started crying. haha. It just re-affirmed how lucky we were to be parents because many can't.
A lot of people kept trying to tell us we were having a boy and we thought the same. We didn't care if we had a boy or girl, but we just wanted the baby to be healthy.
We went to the doctors, the ultrasound tech. within seconds was able to tell us that a sweet baby girl would be coming October 20, 2012.
Ryan and I looked at each other and just smiled, we laughed haha. We were so excited! My woes of the future were gone and I became happier in that moment because we were going to parents very soon.
Time passed and I started falling in love with the idea of being pregnant. I think finally graduating from BYU-Idaho with Ryan was a big relief and amazing accomplishment we got to do together.
He always puts me in perspective and it helped a lot when he would remind me the great opportunity we would have to be parents! :) I couldn't have done this without him thats for sure.
We moved to Idaho Falls in a town home and got all settled in August. A lot of things passed by:
Ryan's brother Glen and his wife Hailey's wedding happened
All my baby showers-understatement remember I have a big fam? :)
Girl's weekend with great friends
and more...
Oh and October 20, 2012 passed too. Yeah, the little bugger was late.
Every time I went to the doctor I was only dilated at a 1-2. So that didn't help.
I became anxious and Ryan became more nervous. We were just waiting haha it seriously is the strangest feeling.
Well that next Saturday I started having some contractions, or the weirdest pain I have ever felt haha.
It hurt but it was mostly uncomfortable. I was worried of course being a first time mother so I probably called the hospital about 8 times total before we actually left.
I went upstairs to tell Ryan that we might have to leave in the middle of the night if the contractions get worse but they would come every hour and a half or so.
Sunday came and they were getting closer, 15 minutes, then 8, then 5, then 4, then 3. Ryan was keeping track in his phone haha.
I finally said we need to go. The pain was so bad I couldn't breath at all. And we actually had to drive up to Rexburg, Madison Memorial Hospital, since that is where our insurance was paying and where my doctor was.
Ryan was reminding me every 2 minutes when my next contraction would come. It's funny now but I didn't like it then haha.
We got to the front desk at about 2:00pm and I had to check-in, while having pain. Seriously took forever, longest 5 minutes of my life. They took us to the room and checked everything and I was dilated at a 4. They left and Ryan and I started laughing about something and then (this next sentence is blunt) I started peeing and couldn't stop in the bed. Then that made us laugh even harder and I couldn't stop. haha it was great.
The nurse came in and she said my water broke! haha we were excited because it was happening! But I was in a lot of pain, handling it well I guess, but still sorry people against medicine but EPIDURAL here I COME!
We changed rooms and I had to wait an hour or so for the anesthesiologist. I was at about a 5-6 wanting the meds, got it, felt amazing. Literally bliss.
Ryan and I wanted to be alone in the room and probably will for all our kids? Who knows. But just being alone together was the best. Very relaxing just having him there for support, less stressful thats for sure. And we have so much family if we let one person in we would have felt like we needed to have more than allowed. However Ryan's mom was the only one close enough that was going to be able to see the baby after she was born which was okay :)
Still waiting to be dilated at a 10 to start pushing, it was only 8:00pm but the meds wore off. ONLY on my left leg-annoying.
My bad-forgot to tell the doctor my spine is slightly twisted, not a big deal im okay promise haha. But you have to tell things like that to the doc apparently. Duh. Last thing on my mind lets be honest.
Since it was taking a long time until I was able to push anyways, they gave me more EPIDURAL, the magic of medicine blessings people blessings.
I was drugged up and it felt good haha. I couldn't feel anything, except my legs were really really heavy.
So as time passed the broncos game was on-GO PEYTON-I think they lost that game though. It was 10:00pm and finally I was at a 10. The nurse came in, Rainey best nurse I have ever heard of, and told me it was time to push!
She and Ryan helped me out for about 2 hours of pushing. The kid wasn't coming out, and I was trying so hard. It didn't help that I the feeling was gone. Okay okay, the downside of epidural I get it but don't regret having it haha.
Anyways, the doc came in and said I needed to push harder or else I would have to do a C-section. Shoot me not happening after all that pushing-EXHAUSTING.
So I pushed again for about an hour and half. She still didn't budge really because of complications. She was twisted and her umbilical cord was shorter than average. The doc was going to have to use forceps to pull out the babe. Yikes. Ryan said they looked like big salad tossers haha.
So finally its 2:30ish am. Just wanting this child to come out because my body can tell something is wrong. It was kind of funny because now that I could feel pressure which helped, the head came out and I thought I was done haha. Ya didn't think about the shoulders.
I won't forget Ryan's reaction when she finally came. He couldn't stop smiling and said, "whoa. that was the coolest thing evverr!" we were so tired haha and we started laughing and smiling just overwhelmed with joy.
October 29, 2012. 2:57am the beautiful Blaire Quinn Bennion was born.
They put her on my chest and that moment was something I will never forget. Having her finally so close to me, holding her was an indescribable experience. There are so many emotions, but you instantly have so much love for something so small.
To know that Heavenly Father trusted me with the responsibility of taking care of one of his sweet children was a blessing. Ryan and I were so thankful. We held her so close as long as we could, we couldn't stop looking at her.
Ryans mother was able to see the baby, she was patiently waiting for a couple hours, but it was fun to show the baby off to her grandma!
We sent pictures (some that I didn't know Ryan shared with the world haha-since he already has I will share it again-above under the paragraph ending in JOY) to everyone. Mostly family and close friends. There was so much love for this sweet baby! At the hospital we had many visitors-thank you again! You know who you are :)
What a blessing she has been. She has taught us how to love more unconditionally. We are so lucky to have her!!! :) :) :)
We love you little b!
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